Living Life
by Sinfully Soulful
Summary: It's hard to live your life when you're still hiding from your past.


"Hey buddy, what's up?" Lucas Scott asked as he flopped down onto the grass, next to his best friend, Haley James.

Haley looked up from her book at Lucas. "Just reading." She said before turning back to her book.

"Haley…"

"Lucas."

"Come on Hales, get up." He said nudging her.

"Why? I'm comfortable and I'm enjoying this very good book." She said showing him her book.

"A Wash in a Sea of Emotions?" He asked as he read the title out loud.

"Yeah it's a book of poetry by this young Latina, her names Cielo."

"You're reading Latina poetry?"

"No it's not Latina. She's Latina. She's about two years older than us. She's originally from New York, but she moved to New Jersey when she was 13. Anyway some of her poems hit kind of close to home." She said as she continued reading.

"I'm sure. I know how you've been struggling being a Latina in the US." He said with a laugh.

"You're such an ass sometimes Luke. I'm enjoying the book, what's wrong with that?"

"Haley you know me, I love books too, but you can't keep hiding behind these books. You need to go and live life."

"I am living life."

"Really how?"

"I'm breathing aren't I?"

"Haha. Come on Haley, Nathan invited me to a party at my uncle's beach house tomorrow after the game. Come with me."

"Lucas you know I hate parties. Especially those that involve jocks and cheerleaders."

"Come on Haley, just one night. Please." He pleaded.

Haley just shook her head. "Fine. Now can I finish my book?"

"Sure thing Hales. I've gotta meet Brooke in the library anyways. I'll see you tonight then? Say about eight?"

"Fine, just go." She said as she opened her book back up to the poem she was reading.

**At Age Five**

_The hot water runs down my body_

_mixing with the blood that's pouring through my cuts._

_I stare at the deep gashes_

_that lay on my arm_

_The silvery blade _

_has fallen onto the floor._

_My head pounds_

_memories of the past assaulting my mind._

_Tears stream down my cheeks..._

_or is that the water?_

_  
He came back last night_

_that evil perverse smile spread across his lips._

_He told me he never forgot._

_The feel of me above him._

_He says he loved the way_

_my bouncy little pig tails _

_flew around my face_

_as he held me to his body._

_How I rocked against him_

_my eyes innocent._

_He said he only stopped _

_cause I became tainted._

_His actions tainted me_

_years ago._

_Now I'm undesirable_

_even to the man I love._

_All because_

_my cousin_

_thought it'd be fun_

_to take away my innocence..._

_at age five._

Haley's House

"Haley! Come on it's time to go." Lucas yelled from the bottom of the stairs.

"Fine. I'm coming." She said as she started down the stairs.

"For someone who wasn't interested in coming, you sure took a long time to get ready." Lucas said with a laugh.

"I've been ready for hours. I'm wearing the same thing I wore to school." She told him.

"So why it take you so long?" He asked as they headed out of the house and to his car.

Haley pulled the folded paperback from her back pocket. "I was reading." She said as she hopped into the car and continued to read.

Lucas just laughed as he drove them to the beach house.

"So how long do we have to stay?" Haley asked as she started to climb out of the car.

"Leave the book Haley and focus on having fun." He said as he locked the door.

"Yeah fun." She said as she spotted random drunk couples making out all over the front porch of the Scott beach house.

"Hey Tutor Girl, glad you finally came." Brooke Davis said before giving her boyfriend a kiss.

"Yeah well your boyfriend was being an ass." Haley said to the brunette.

"Hey Haley." Peyton said as she came outside holding a plastic cup.

"Hey Peyton." Haley said to Brooke's best friend. "Luke call me when we leave." She said as she snatched her book from the open window and headed away from the house towards the beach.

"What's up with her?" Brooke asked her boyfriend.

"You know Haley. She hates parties."

"So why'd she come?" Peyton asked.

"I annoyed her till she said yes. Just wanted her to get out of the house for a night."

"What's her deal anyway?" Brooke asked.

"Nothing Brooke, she just doesn't like crowds." Lucas said getting defensive. He knew Haley wasn't exactly Miss Popularity, but she was still his best friend.

"Sorry Broody." Brooke said before kissing him once more. "Come on let's dance." She said pulling Lucas towards the house.

Luke took one last glance back at Haley before entering the house with Brooke and Peyton.

Haley walked through the sand carrying her book. She couldn't find a decent spot on the beach to read. Everywhere she looked there were couples making out. "Urgh." She said kicking up some sand in frustration.

"Hey, watch it."

"Oh I'm sorry I didn't…" Haley started as she noticed the guy covered in sand sitting on the floor. "Nathan?" She asked when she noticed the blue eyed boy.

"Hey Haley, what are you doing here?" He asked as he stood up.

"Luke dragged me here." She said craning her neck so she could look at him.

"Yeah, sounds like Luke."

"What are you doing here?"

"It's my parent's house Haley."

"I know that smart ass. I meant outside. Why aren't you inside with the team, drinking or up in one of the million rooms you guys have, having sex with some random slut." She asked.

"Maybe I don't want to be."

Haley shrugged. "Whatever." She said turning to walk away.

Nathan turned to look at her. He'd only recently met Haley when his cousin Lucas had joined the team earlier in the season. He remembered thinking that the sadness in her eyes matched the sadness inside himself, perfectly, but being Mr. Popular, he couldn't exactly say that to her.

Haley just thought of him as some stupid jock. He however thought she was amazing.

Nathan sighed.

Haley had sat down not far from where he had been sitting just moments earlier.

"What's wrong Scott?" She asked, never looking up from her book.

"What do you mean?" He asked, caught a little off guard by the question.

"I'm smelling burnt brain cells, figure you must be thinking about something." She said looking up from her book and giving him a sarcastic smirk.

Nathan walked over to where she sat and sat down next to her. "Haley why don't you ever come to these parties? Why aren't you part of any after school activities?" He asked.

"I tutor, that's my after school activity. Plus I work at Karen's. Between that stuff and school, there isn't much time for anything else." She lied.

Nathan just looked at her doubtfully.

"What?" She asked a bit too defensively.

"Just, Haley, my aunt closes the café by eight. School is only five days a week, from 7am to 3pm."

"So your point?"

"So unless you're tutoring all night and all Saturday and Sunday, then you're lying when you say you have no time for anything else."

Haley looked back down at her book. "What I do with my free time is none of your business Nathan Scott."

"Never said it was, I was just wondering is all."

"Well stop it. You keep wondering about things and you'll burn the few brain cells you've still got." She told him.

"Whatever Haley. Just sit here and read." He said as he stood up and turned back to the house. "Just remember that while you're reading your books, everyone else is living their lives." He said before heading back in the direction of the house.


End file.
